CONCORD, N.C. – NASCAR fans have been criticized for a number of things over the years, ranging from perpetuating a redneck stereotype to still showing pride in the Rebel Flag.
Now, as one Mississippi congressman would have you believe, NASCAR fans are also a threat to national security and the nation's health.
Yes, you, Bubba. You, too, Bobbie Sue. Y'all got the cooties.
That's what Rep. Bennie Thompson (D-Miss.), Chairman of the House Committee on Homeland Security, would have you believe.
The seven-term Congressman recently instructed committee aides who visited Talladega Superspeedway last weekend and are also at this weekend's Nextel Cup race at Lowe's Motor Speedway to be immunized against a variety of diseases such as hepatitis A, hepatitis B, diphtheria, tetanus and influenza.
Officially, the action was supposedly part of a broader review of federal response to massive emergencies at a large, crowded venue like Lowe's Motor Speedway.
Unofficially, Thompson unquestionably must think of NASCAR fans as a bunch of sickos – and not in a good way.
The hue and outcry resulting from Thompson's actions have become nothing short of a political embarrassment.
However, I admit Thompson did get me a bit suspicious at first. When I first heard the news, I immediately reflected back to one of NASCAR's biggest marketing campaigns in recent years: NASCAR – How bad have YOU got it?
By Thompson's standards, you've not only got it bad – but you're also a walking, talking, fire-breathing, beer-drinking, tobacco-spittin', cussin' and cheerin' sumbitch who is carrying enough pestilence and pathos to bring the good, old U.S. of A to its knees.
You would think that a veteran Congressman – and from a state that has a huge NASCAR fan base – would be a bit savvier when it comes to messin' with the go straight and turn left crowd.
Instead, Thompson paints a picture of folks, who come to races from New Hampshire to southern California, as potentially carrying more communicable diseases than folks in a third-world country.
As can be expected, others countered that Thompson's edict was more liberal Democratic "the-sky-is-falling" hysteria mongering. Even members of his own party have to be wondering, "What is this guy thinking?"
Thompson would have been smart if he had laughed things off when the relatively silent instruction for staffers to get their shots suddenly became national news. Instead, he kept digging himself a deeper hole – and I'm betting especially so with Mississippi voters who just happen to be NASCAR fans.
When he appeared in a debate with Rep. Robin Hayes (R-N.C.) on CNN, Thompson told Hayes he "ought to be ashamed" for criticizing efforts to protect the committee's staffers.
Hayes deadpanned – and good for him in doing so – "We got our shots when we were born."
What's next? Ostracizing NASCAR fans like smokers? Is being a racing fan suddenly akin to being a leper?
God forbid that a non-NASCAR fan suddenly comes down with a bad case of Junior-itis. What would Thompson's response be? Require widespread institutionalizing or mass inoculations?
And no, I'm not talking about using inoculation needles to tattoo an 8 or 88 on your skin to try and relieve the Junior fever.
There's no question that NASCAR has fought a serious image problem for much of its nearly 60 years of existence.
There's been the redneck stereotype, the Rebel Flag controversy, being sponsored for 30 years by a cigarette company and the "fun" fans have tossing beer cans onto race tracks when they don't quite care for the race outcome.
And now this most recent embarrassment. What's a poor NASCAR fan to do?
Granted, there are some NASCAR fans that are, shall we say, socially challenged – the type that sometimes forget their weekly shower, eschew deodorant in favor of the "natural" smell and have ample beer bellies that should have Goodyear stamped across 'em – but that doesn't mean they're disease-carrying threats to national security.
But Thompson appears to think so.
Actually, he should be thanking those of you who've slapped a No. 8 or 24 or 48 sticker on your car for the warning, because now he knows to steer clear of you on the highway.
Saturday, October 13, 2007
Tuesday, October 9, 2007
Sipping Vodka (Funny)
SIPPING VODKA
This is too funny – I still have tears in my eyes!
It’s funny
A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak.
After mass he asked the monsignor how he had done.
The monsignor replied, “When I am worried about getting nervous On the pulpit, I put a glass of vodka next to the water glass. If I start to get nervous, I take a sip.”
So next Sunday he took the monsignor’s advice.
At the beginning of the sermon, he got nervous and took a drink.
He proceeded to talk up a storm.
Upon his return to his office after the mass, he found the following note on the door:
1) Sip the vodka, don’t gulp.
2) There are 10 commandments, not 12.
3) There are 12 disciples, not 10.
4) Jesus was consecrated, not constipated.
5) Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet his ass.
6) We do not refer to Jesus Christ as the late J.C.
7) The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are not referred to as Daddy, Junior and the spook.
8) David slew Goliath, he did not kick the sh *t out of him.
9) When David was hit by a rock and was knocked off his donkey, don’t say he was stoned off his ass.
10)We do not refer to the cross as the “Big T.”
11)When Jesus broke the bread at the last supper he said, “ take this and eat it for it is my body.” He did not say “ Eat me” .
12)The Virgin Mary is not called “ Mary with the Cherry,.
13)The recommended grace before a meal is not: Rub-A-Dub-Dub thanks for the grub, Yeah God.
14)Next Sunday there will be a taffy pulling contest at ST.Peter’s not a peter pulling contest at St. Taffy’s.
This is too funny – I still have tears in my eyes!
It’s funny
A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak.
After mass he asked the monsignor how he had done.
The monsignor replied, “When I am worried about getting nervous On the pulpit, I put a glass of vodka next to the water glass. If I start to get nervous, I take a sip.”
So next Sunday he took the monsignor’s advice.
At the beginning of the sermon, he got nervous and took a drink.
He proceeded to talk up a storm.
Upon his return to his office after the mass, he found the following note on the door:
1) Sip the vodka, don’t gulp.
2) There are 10 commandments, not 12.
3) There are 12 disciples, not 10.
4) Jesus was consecrated, not constipated.
5) Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet his ass.
6) We do not refer to Jesus Christ as the late J.C.
7) The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are not referred to as Daddy, Junior and the spook.
8) David slew Goliath, he did not kick the sh *t out of him.
9) When David was hit by a rock and was knocked off his donkey, don’t say he was stoned off his ass.
10)We do not refer to the cross as the “Big T.”
11)When Jesus broke the bread at the last supper he said, “ take this and eat it for it is my body.” He did not say “ Eat me” .
12)The Virgin Mary is not called “ Mary with the Cherry,.
13)The recommended grace before a meal is not: Rub-A-Dub-Dub thanks for the grub, Yeah God.
14)Next Sunday there will be a taffy pulling contest at ST.Peter’s not a peter pulling contest at St. Taffy’s.
9-11-01 NEVER Forget!
ALL EUROPEAN LIFE DIED IN AUSCHWITZ
The following is a copy of an article written by Spanish writer Sebastian Vilar Rodrigez and published in a Spanish newspaper on 5-22-07. It doesn't take much imagination to extrapolate the message to the rest of Europe- and possibly to the rest of the world. =================================
REMEMBER AS YOU READ -- IT WAS IN A SPANISH PAPER
Date: Tue, 22 May 2007
ALL EUROPEAN LIFE DIED IN AUSCHWITZ
By Sebastian Vilar Rodrigez
I walked down the street in Barcelona, and suddenly
discovered a terrible truth - Europe died in Auschwitz.
We killed six million Jews and replaced them with 20
million Muslims. In Auschwitz burned a culture,
thought, creativity, talent. We destroyed the chosen
people, truly chosen, because they produced great and
wonderful people who changed the world.
The contribution of this people is felt in all areas of
life: science, art, international trade, and above all,
as the conscience of the world. These are the people
we burned.
And under the pretense of tolerance, and because we
wanted to prove to ourselves that we were cured of the
disease of racism, we opened our gates to 20 million
Muslims, who brought us stupidity and ignorance,
religious extremism and lack of tolerance, crime and
poverty, due to an unwillingness to work and support
their families with pride.
They have turned our beautiful Spanish cities into the
third world, drowning in filth and crime.
Shut up in the apartments they receive free from the
government, they plan the murder and destruction of
their naive hosts.
And thus, in our misery, we have exchanged culture for
fanatical hatred, creative skill for destructive skill, intelligence for backwardness and superstition.
We have exchanged the pursuit of peace of the Jews of
Europe and their talent for hoping for a better future
for their children, their determined clinging to life
because life is holy, for those who pursue death, for
people consumed by the desire for death for themselves
and others, for our children and theirs.
What a terrible mistake was made by miserable Europe.
***********************************
A lot of Americans have become so insulated from reality
that they imagine America can suffer defeat without any inconvenience to themselves.
Absolutely No Profiling! Pause a moment, reflect back, and take the following multiple choice test.
These events are actual events from history. They really happened! Do you remember?
1. 1968 Bobby Kennedy was shot and killed by
a. Superman
b. Jay Leno
c. Harry Potter
d.. a Muslim male extremist between the ages of 17 and 40
2. In 1972 at the Munich Olympics, athletes were kidnapped and massacred by:
a. Olga Corbett
b. Sitting Bull
c. Arnold Schwarzenegger
d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40
3. In 1979, the US embassy in Iran was taken over by:
a. Lost Norwegians
b. Elvis
c. A tour bus full of 80-year-old women
d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40
4. During the 1980's a number of Americans were kidnapped in Lebanon by:
a. John Dillinger
b. The King of Sweden
c. The Boy Scouts
d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40
5. In 1983, the US Marine barracks in Beirut was blown up by:
a. A pizza delivery boy
b. Pee Wee Herman
c. Geraldo Rivera
d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40
6. In 1985 the cruise ship Achille Lauro was hijacked and a 70 year old American passenger was murdered and thrown overboard in his wheelchair by:
a. The Smurfs
b. Davey Jones
c. The Little Mermaid
d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40
7. In 1985 TWA flight 847 was hijacked at Athens, and a US Navy diver trying to rescue passengers was murdered by:
a. Captain Kidd
b. Charles Lindberg
c. Mother Teresa
d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40
8. In 1988, Pan Am Flight 103 was bombed by:
a. Scooby Doo
b. The Tooth Fairy and The Sundance Kid
d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40
9. In 1993 the World Trade Center was bombed the first time by:
a. Richard Simmons
b. Grandma Moses
c. Michael Jordan
d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40
10. In 1998, the US embassies in Kenya and Tanzania were bombed by:
a. Mr. Rogers
b. Hillary Clinton, to distract attention from Wild Bill's women problems
c. The World Wrestling Federation
d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40
11. On 9/11/01, four airliners were hijacked; two were used as missiles to take out the World Trade Centers and of the remaining two, one crashed into the US Pentagon and the other was diverted and crashed by the passengers.
Thousands of people were killed by:
a. Bugs Bunny, Wiley E. Coyote, Daffy Duck and Elmer Fudd
b. The Supreme Court of Florida
c. Mr. Bean
d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40
12. In 2002 the United States fought a war in Afghanistan against:
a. Enron
b. The Lutheran Church
c. The NFL
d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40
13. In 2002 reporter Daniel Pearl was kidnapped and murdered by:
a. Bonnie and Clyde
b. Captain Kangaroo
c. Billy Graham
d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40
No, I really don't see a pattern here to justify profiling, do you? So, to ensure we Americans never offend anyone, particularly fanatics intent on killing us, airport security screeners will no longer be allowed to profile certain people. They must conduct random searches of 80-year-old women, little kids, airline pilots with proper identification, secret agents who are members of the President's security detail, 85-year old Congressmen with metal hips, and Medal of Honor winning and former Governor Joe Foss, but leave Muslim Males between the ages 17 and 40 alone lest they be guilty of profiling.
Let's send this to as many people as we can so that the Gloria Aldreds and other dunder-headed attorneys along with Federal Justices that want to thwart common sense, feel ashamed of themselves -- if they have any such sense.
As the writer of the award winning story "Forrest Gump" so aptly put it, "Stupid is as stupid does."
Come on people wake up!!! Keep this going. Our Country and our troops need our support.
P. S. And guess who bombed London?
The following is a copy of an article written by Spanish writer Sebastian Vilar Rodrigez and published in a Spanish newspaper on 5-22-07. It doesn't take much imagination to extrapolate the message to the rest of Europe- and possibly to the rest of the world. =================================
REMEMBER AS YOU READ -- IT WAS IN A SPANISH PAPER
Date: Tue, 22 May 2007
ALL EUROPEAN LIFE DIED IN AUSCHWITZ
By Sebastian Vilar Rodrigez
I walked down the street in Barcelona, and suddenly
discovered a terrible truth - Europe died in Auschwitz.
We killed six million Jews and replaced them with 20
million Muslims. In Auschwitz burned a culture,
thought, creativity, talent. We destroyed the chosen
people, truly chosen, because they produced great and
wonderful people who changed the world.
The contribution of this people is felt in all areas of
life: science, art, international trade, and above all,
as the conscience of the world. These are the people
we burned.
And under the pretense of tolerance, and because we
wanted to prove to ourselves that we were cured of the
disease of racism, we opened our gates to 20 million
Muslims, who brought us stupidity and ignorance,
religious extremism and lack of tolerance, crime and
poverty, due to an unwillingness to work and support
their families with pride.
They have turned our beautiful Spanish cities into the
third world, drowning in filth and crime.
Shut up in the apartments they receive free from the
government, they plan the murder and destruction of
their naive hosts.
And thus, in our misery, we have exchanged culture for
fanatical hatred, creative skill for destructive skill, intelligence for backwardness and superstition.
We have exchanged the pursuit of peace of the Jews of
Europe and their talent for hoping for a better future
for their children, their determined clinging to life
because life is holy, for those who pursue death, for
people consumed by the desire for death for themselves
and others, for our children and theirs.
What a terrible mistake was made by miserable Europe.
***********************************
A lot of Americans have become so insulated from reality
that they imagine America can suffer defeat without any inconvenience to themselves.
Absolutely No Profiling! Pause a moment, reflect back, and take the following multiple choice test.
These events are actual events from history. They really happened! Do you remember?
1. 1968 Bobby Kennedy was shot and killed by
a. Superman
b. Jay Leno
c. Harry Potter
d.. a Muslim male extremist between the ages of 17 and 40
2. In 1972 at the Munich Olympics, athletes were kidnapped and massacred by:
a. Olga Corbett
b. Sitting Bull
c. Arnold Schwarzenegger
d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40
3. In 1979, the US embassy in Iran was taken over by:
a. Lost Norwegians
b. Elvis
c. A tour bus full of 80-year-old women
d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40
4. During the 1980's a number of Americans were kidnapped in Lebanon by:
a. John Dillinger
b. The King of Sweden
c. The Boy Scouts
d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40
5. In 1983, the US Marine barracks in Beirut was blown up by:
a. A pizza delivery boy
b. Pee Wee Herman
c. Geraldo Rivera
d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40
6. In 1985 the cruise ship Achille Lauro was hijacked and a 70 year old American passenger was murdered and thrown overboard in his wheelchair by:
a. The Smurfs
b. Davey Jones
c. The Little Mermaid
d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40
7. In 1985 TWA flight 847 was hijacked at Athens, and a US Navy diver trying to rescue passengers was murdered by:
a. Captain Kidd
b. Charles Lindberg
c. Mother Teresa
d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40
8. In 1988, Pan Am Flight 103 was bombed by:
a. Scooby Doo
b. The Tooth Fairy and The Sundance Kid
d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40
9. In 1993 the World Trade Center was bombed the first time by:
a. Richard Simmons
b. Grandma Moses
c. Michael Jordan
d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40
10. In 1998, the US embassies in Kenya and Tanzania were bombed by:
a. Mr. Rogers
b. Hillary Clinton, to distract attention from Wild Bill's women problems
c. The World Wrestling Federation
d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40
11. On 9/11/01, four airliners were hijacked; two were used as missiles to take out the World Trade Centers and of the remaining two, one crashed into the US Pentagon and the other was diverted and crashed by the passengers.
Thousands of people were killed by:
a. Bugs Bunny, Wiley E. Coyote, Daffy Duck and Elmer Fudd
b. The Supreme Court of Florida
c. Mr. Bean
d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40
12. In 2002 the United States fought a war in Afghanistan against:
a. Enron
b. The Lutheran Church
c. The NFL
d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40
13. In 2002 reporter Daniel Pearl was kidnapped and murdered by:
a. Bonnie and Clyde
b. Captain Kangaroo
c. Billy Graham
d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40
No, I really don't see a pattern here to justify profiling, do you? So, to ensure we Americans never offend anyone, particularly fanatics intent on killing us, airport security screeners will no longer be allowed to profile certain people. They must conduct random searches of 80-year-old women, little kids, airline pilots with proper identification, secret agents who are members of the President's security detail, 85-year old Congressmen with metal hips, and Medal of Honor winning and former Governor Joe Foss, but leave Muslim Males between the ages 17 and 40 alone lest they be guilty of profiling.
Let's send this to as many people as we can so that the Gloria Aldreds and other dunder-headed attorneys along with Federal Justices that want to thwart common sense, feel ashamed of themselves -- if they have any such sense.
As the writer of the award winning story "Forrest Gump" so aptly put it, "Stupid is as stupid does."
Come on people wake up!!! Keep this going. Our Country and our troops need our support.
P. S. And guess who bombed London?
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